feat(macos): validate dev + apple-dev presets on macOS, fix 3 cross-platform bugs

macOS port groundwork — core, server, tools, and tests now build and run on
macOS 26.5 / Apple Silicon. ctest --preset dev green 21/21 (2 consecutive runs).
apple-dev produces valid arm64 libvoicecat.a + XCFramework for the Swift Package.

Three real cross-platform bugs found and fixed (all latent on Windows/Linux):

1. test_m2_voice.cpp POSIX branch missing <netdb.h> — Linux glibc transitively
   includes it, macOS doesn't. Would fail on any strict POSIX system.

2. SIGPIPE killing processes on macOS — writing to a closed TCP socket raises
   SIGPIPE by default (doesn't exist on Windows, benign on Linux). Fixed by
   ignoring SIGPIPE in both core client init and server startup (POSIX-only,
   #ifndef _WIN32). Production fix, not just tests.

3. Use-after-free of Asio's kqueue reactor on server shutdown — the
   deterministic test_tofu_flow segfault. TcpServerConn's tls_read_loop runs on
   a blocking-I/O thread; when Server::run() returned, io_context was destroyed
   while those threads were still running. On macOS kqueue the reactor pointer
   is null'd immediately -> segfault in socket.close(). Latent on Windows IOCP
   and Linux epoll. Fix: TcpAcceptor now tracks connections; new shutdown()
   closes all + joins threads before io is destroyed; Server::stop() now closes
   acceptor + media_relay too (was just io.stop()).

Verified: dev + apple-dev presets build green, 21/21 tests pass, server starts
+ two vccli text chat over TLS (M1 on Mac), vccli --voice starts MIC stream via
CoreAudio (M2 protocol-level), vccli --list-devices enumerates CoreAudio
devices, xcodebuild -create-xcframework produces valid VoiceCatCore.xcframework.

No ABI or proto changes. Docs updated: building.md, clients/apple/README.md,
PROGRESS.md, CLAUDE.md status line.

tests/test_m2_voice.cpp

@@ -36,6 +36,7 @@
    static int sock_error() { return WSAGetLastError(); }
 #else
 #  include <arpa/inet.h>
+#  include <netdb.h>
 #  include <netinet/in.h>
 #  include <sys/socket.h>
 #  include <unistd.h>